As you know there are a few things that are factoring in with Korey and his multiple therapies. During his last speech therapy his therapist suggested moving him up to two visits a week. Any parent would normally jump right at the chance and have said yes already but I have been sitting on it and will give her an answer Thursday when she comes.
Why the wait for an answer? Well he already has three sessions a week, this will make it four. Add on top of that the fact that his brother will be here in January making it almost impossible for me to be able to concentrate on taking care of a newborn, recovering and helping Korey with his therapies. I want the best for him but I’m afraid it’s going to drive me over the edge.
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The focus would change with these speech therapies now, and really focus on getting verbal out of him. He has picked up signing and starting to use some constants and vowels but now we would be giving him no choice but to talk. He would probably be in his booster most of the time with his tray attached so he doesn’t run away. When something becomes difficult for him he completely melts down and just tries to avoid the situation. More crying out of him and having to tell him “oh well, you have to do it.”
It’s difficult to put him in that situation but I want speech out of him. I don’t think that the therapist see how hard it is on me, I think I put on a pretty good front. It’s not because it’s so hard that he can’t do these things but more that he use to do them. I had a few months of him being okay after his first year and then things just stopped and he became so bad. Like watching someone you love going through dementia or amnesia and they just really start to change.
Korey is really intelligent but when you try to get him to talk or communicate without knowing how it works for him he can seem slow or just shy. If this keeps up and he is still like this when he is evaluated at 3 then he will most likely be in a special class with children with speech issues only. That hurts my heart so bad to know that I have to trust someone to know what he’s wanting and to help him for those two hours that he will get better in their hands while I’m still helping at home.
I know that it will be alot on your plate but it will be worth it. I am going to tell you the story of my mother. Yes, it is a true story. I was born in April of 1973 at 3 months premature. As a result when I was 1 1/2 I was diagnosed with having Cerebral Palsy. My brother was born in September of 1974. When my mom was 3 months pregnant with him she almost lost him and she was on total bed rest. My grandmother had to live with us and take care of me. My dad had to go to work. My mother wasn’t sure if she would have anymore kids or not due to the fact that I was born a preemie and that she almost lost my brother. In January of 1979 my sister was born, then in May of 1981 another sister was born. In the fall of 1982 my sister that was born in 1979 was diagnosed with a cancerous brain tumor. At this time my mom was pregnant with my sister who was born via c section in April of 1983. After my sister had her tumor removed she head to go to the hospital once a week (the hospital is 2 hours away from where we live) to have radiation treatments. Some times my parents would drive the whole way there and turn around and come home because the machine was broke. Keep in my that she had a brand new baby at home a 11/2 year old at home and me who has cerebral palsy and needed to go to physical therapy 3 times a week. My parents did this for the next approximately 2 years constantly running my sister to the specialists 2 hours a way, taking me to therapy 3 times a week. Some how they survived and their children are doing pretty well. By the way, my dad was unemployed from 1982-1983. Yes, my sister and I still have our issues but we are very grateful of the sacrifices that our parents made for us. So you see it can always be worse.
Thank you so much for your comment. It’s not that I needed this as a case to show me there are worse but what you said at the end, that you two are grateful for what your parents did. The therapists constantly remind us how great we are as parents but I want Korey to know that when he gets older. You have certainly made my night tonight, I needed to read this. I cannot thank you enough for that, by far my favorite comment I have ever gotten.
Remember, as a parent, you are a blessing to your child. You are their hero and their rock in this crazy world. If you follow your heart, you’re making the right choice.
What a full plate you have. I can’t imagine the stress and heartache you have watching your son. Willkeep you inmy prayers
I’m so sorry to hear about your son’s troubles. Remember that God gives his toughest battles to his strongest soldiers. Trust in him. =) Sending happy thoughts and prayers your family’s way!
First let me say that I think you are one strong mom! But I think you should just be honest with his therapist and not take on another session for at least a little while. You aren’t going to do anyone any good if you have a total meltdown after the baby comes. I comment you for it. There is only so much that you can do and do it well! Don’t feel bad about it. I will be praying for you.
This is a tough one. I have been there and it’s different for each parent as it is for each child. The hardest part for me was give the therapist enough trust. I was thinking it’s my child and no one knows him better then I do. All I can say from my experience and you know what they say about hindsight being 20/20 vision. I look back now and think that maybe I was enabling him. I knew him so well and knew what he wanted that he didn’t have to speak. Maybe my doing everything for him made it easier on him not having to speak. I just took care of everything because I could figure out what he wanted most of the time. What ever you decide, I wish you the best.
My only advice is to follow your heart. As a mom, you know what is best for your child and know how much you can handle. I know having a newborn makes things difficult, but in the long run things will work out. I wish you the best!
It’s a tough decision to have to make and if you do decide to add another session it will certainly add more stress to your life. The real question is will it really be tremendously beneficial to your son. To help you make an informed decision I’d talk to the therapist and tell her all your worries and fears. She may think that she’s near to a breakthrough point and thus wants to concentrate on him more. Once she knows how you feel, she should also be able to tell you whether it would be ok to wait a while longer with more sessions per week. Whatever you decide will be okay, you have to feel good about your decision and yourself.
That is quite a lot to handle. I’m sorry that you’re going through this. I’ll say a prayer for you and your son.
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My mother used to run a workshop for people will all kinds of delays- and I believe that what makes you different makes you special. 🙂